Posted by: bourbonmama | 31/07/2009

101 Things

Oh crap!  I didn’t realize that last post was my 100th!  I was going to do something special.  Oh, well.  Now you get an impossibly long list of “facts” about me. 

Welcome to the land of a thousand links.

  1. I come from a family of 7 kids.
  2. That’s 5 boys, 2 girls.
  3. But really, two tom-boys.
  4. My mom is crazy.
  5. And a drunk.
  6. My father is still my hero.
  7. He introduced me to the beauty that is watching a summer thunderstorm from a porch swing.
  8. He also introduced me to jazz and big band music.
  9. Philip is my life partner.
  10. I know that sounds gay, but it’s better than saying “live-in lover.”
  11. Not that sounding gay is bad, I actually love me some gays.
  12. I secretly want to get married, even though I say that I don’t.
  13. I really just wanna get all dressed up and have everyone look at me.
  14. Did I mention I’m the middle child?
  15. We’ve been together for seven years.
  16. He drives a motorcycle.
  17. We have a son.
  18. He is my world.
  19. I didn’t want to name him Nathaniel, but it was the only name we could agree on.
  20. I wanted to name him Charles Dominic, after my father and brother.
  21. We waited till after he was born to tell everyone, because we couldn’t make a decision.
  22. After 9 1/2 hours of labor and a c-section, I told Philip that I was naming the next boy Charles Dominic and he got no say in it.
  23. He said, “We’ll see.”
  24. Damn, I’m not even to 25, yet.
  25. I am poor white trash.
  26. From Kentucky.
  27. Aside from the years I spent in Tennessee.
  28. I am super loud and obnoxious. 
  29. But only if I’m comfortable with you, and/or slightly drunk.
  30. Santa never came to my house and I never got to go trick-or-treating.
  31. To make up for this, I vowed to never grow up.
  32. I am scared shitless of turning thirty.
  33. I am super over-analytical.
  34. I spent three and a half years getting a two year degree and have nothing to show for it but a piece of paper and a lot of debt.
  35. I miss going to school.
  36. my Mother-in-law= Marie Barron – the bitchiness.
  37. I have a very checkered past.
  38. The stories I tell here are PG 13.
  39. If you know me for reals, I will tell you the NC17 ones.
  40. The sound of a child’s laughter is the sweetest thing in the world. 
  41. I waste a lot of time looking for 4-leafed clovers.
  42. My favorite books are fairy tales.
  43. And, grown-up fairy tales, like Confessions of An Ugly Step-Sister.
  44. Garlic is my favorite flavor.
  45. I think that’s a requirement when you’re Italian.
  46. Girls in fuzzy boots and mini skirts make me want to ralph.
  47. His name is Raaaalph.”
  48. Did I mention my checkered past?
  49. Gawd, I’m not even to 50.
  50. I hate wearing shoes.
  51. I think my feet are claustrophobic. 
  52. I can’t even cover them when I’m sleeping.
  53. If we take a roadtrip together, my bare feet will surely be hanging out the passenger window with in minutes of getting on the highway.
  54. I like bourbon.
  55. Which is pretty obvious, considering the title of this here blog
  56. I don’t say, “this here,” in real life.
  57. I used to play the violin.
  58. For 5 years.
  59. I quit because the teacher was a bitch and would still be my teacher in high school.
  60. If it hadn’t been for her, I’d still play.
  61. I wish I hadn’t quit.
  62. She wouldn’t let me play first chair because I couldn’t tune my own instrument.
  63. Not because I couldn’t play, but because I am tone-deaf.
  64. Philip banned me from singing lullabies.
  65. He doesn’t realise that I still sing to Nate in the car.
  66. In my head, I sound awesome.
  67. I was in the drama club in high school.
  68. I quit that because the teacher was a bitch, too.
  69. Damn bitchy teachers.
  70. I’m beginning to wonder if it was my bitchiness that was the problem.
  71. I was born in 1980, but somehow have managed to stay 26.
  72. I went to a special school 4th-6th grade, until we moved out of state.
  73. No, not that kind of special, this kind.
  74. My major was creative writing. 
  75. My teacher was a children’s author.
  76. And, kinda my idol.
  77. A few years after we moved, she came to do a reading at my little brothers’ elementary school. 
  78. My mother took me to see her, and she didn’t remember me.
  79. It broke my heart.
  80. I am a dork, in every sense of the word.
  81. I tend to ramble.
  82. So much so that I often forget my point.
  83. But that is how you get the best stories.
  84. I’m short.
  85. Very short.
  86. Like 3 inches too tall to be required to sit in a booster seat short.
  87. Unless I’m wearing make-up and grown up clothes (i.e. something that did not come from the juniors department), people tend to think I’m a teenager.
  88. I used to hate this, but now it’s awesome, just like everybody said it would be.
  89. Did I mention I don’t wanna grow up?
  90. I cuss.  A lot.
  91. I worry that Nate will tell his teachers to fuck off.
  92. And, that I’ll laugh.
  93. I am not housewife material.
  94. I don’t do well with a broom or frying pan.
  95. Unless they’re used as a weapon, in which case I rock.
  96. I used to paint.
  97. It’s been 18 mos since I’ve painted anything.
  98. Crazy, that’s exactly how old Nate is.
  99. I talk.  A lot.
  100. I cackle when I laugh.
  101. Unless I’m snorting.

Alright, there ya go.  Are y’all still there?  Did you learn anything new?  Is there anything I left out that you’d like to know?



  1. I miss going to school too.

  2. LOL! This is hilarious! Wish I hadn’t already past my 100 post, this is a great way to celebrate it!

    • Actually, I saw this on another blog and forgot about it until my 105th post. Then, i went through and deleted crappy posts and was down to like 90-something, and then forgot again, which is why it is 101 instead of 100. So, maybe you could do that? Or you could list 137 things.

  3. This reminds me that my 100th is coming up soon! I lost you there for a while and I was totally bummed! You always make me laugh!

    • Glad you’re back, Shelli! I was wondering where you’d gone!

  4. hee hee. i like you.

    • And, I you.

  5. Hey! I am poor white trash from Kentucky also! hooray for us!

  6. I STILL haven’t found a four leaf clover!! I have a field full of the stuff, but I am still looking!

    • if you wanna email me your address, I’ll send ya one. I promise I’m not a crazy stalker.

  7. Is it flooding there? Be careful if you go out!!

    • No flooding, but gawd, it won’t stop raining!

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